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View from my dorm room — June 2014 // “I'll miss this beautiful view when I graduate from this school.”

Replying to my 18-year-old self

Nana June 17, 2017

I made a video when I was 18-year-old dedicated to my 21-year-old self (which is me now). I looked absolutely hideous in the video so I decided to transcribe what I said in the video, and write a reply back (instead of making a video response).

Here goes.

( italics = 18-year-old Nana transcript / bold = current 21-year-old Nana reply )

Hi this is a message to my 21-year-old self which is 2 years from now so hi 2 years older Nana (you mean 3 years older - ow man I really suck at maths ahahah) - my god my hair looks horrible I am sorry; I'm wearing no make up at all. I just watched musicalbethan's video on youtube where she made a video when she was 16 for her 18 year old self, and then she made a response to that video because she's 18 now obviously. That kinda inspired me to make this video. *looks at self on computer screen* I look horrible I'm- *blerghh* I don't know why I chose to do it today. (*pats little Nana* I'm so sorry you were so insecure back then. *hugs*) I should be studying for my trials next week. *sigh* 

Okay so, I'm at ******* school. It is spring term. It's 11th of January, 2014.

So these are the things that I hoped I would have accomplished by you now. So I'll be in second year of - well in the middle of second year - of biomedical science degree hopefully? yes? maybe? (no, final year silly) In University of Surrey right? (yes girl) I hope I'll get the grades. I will get the grades right? You got the grades to get into University of Surrey. (yup I did, woohoo) And...


1. Weight loss

You should have lost some weight right - I should be looking at the camera *looks at webcam* - it's kinda creepy. (haha what the heck, you weirdo) Hopefully I would have lost some weight. I hope you're into a healthy lifestyle because right now as you know - this is the heaviest I've ever been in my entire life, and I hope you have lost some weight and got into heavy weightlifting and cardio and all that stuff hopefully, and eating healthy right.. yes?

Indeed I am a lot healthier and more active than you are now, little Nana. I actually lost 12 kg in the past 2 years or so. But then I gained some weight back recently due to a few factors but don’t worry about it.

2. Hair

Hope you grew your hair longer, and I have some more hair - maybe extensions, I don't know?

Hahaha guurl I just cut it short, it's at shoulder level now.

3. Fashion sense

I hope I have.. you have a good fashion sense now right? 21.. you should be dressing well especially that I'm close in London-ish.. Surrey.. right..

Yup my fashion sense is better than yours now, with a big thanks to my boyfriend, Akash. He's the fashionista in our relationship and he helps pick clothes for me on most occasions.

4. Mindset / Friends

I hope I have got out of my self-destructive mindset. That would be really nice right? Be happy. Hopefully you'll have a boyfriend, maybe? If you don't that's okay but hopefully you'll have some friends in Surrey.. Thai friends, maybe? Because there's no Thai friends here.. they're all in the younger years right.. remember?

Yeah of course I remember. In terms of making new Thai friends.. yes and no. I met some Thai people in uni but we're not close enough to call each other good friends. However, I did make some other nice friends from my course and societies' events, and they're all really lovely. I'm happy to tell you that I got out of the self-destructive mindset pretty much as soon as I got to uni because I met Akash. He's helped me in more ways than I could count.

5. Tumblr

Uhh.. oh you are still on tumblr right? Please tell me you're still on tumblr. I hope to at least reach 10k followers yess I hope you have 10k followers by then.. yeah right now i have 5k.. 5.2k but apparently I'm losing followers like almost everyday now. I don't know why but also gaining at the same time but more of losing so I hope you have 10k followers somehow on tumblr. Username right now is *** so yeah.

Yeah I'm still on tumblr but I don't use that account anymore. I really cannot care less about followers now, little Nana.


That's it pretty much.

To my 21-year-old self - if you're going through a hard time which I hope you're not but you'll get through it okay.. you're strong. Get your shit together, and be happy. I hope you're happy, you're healthy and well. I hope mom and dad and brother and sister are doing well as well. Good luck if you're having any exam soon.

Thank you, little Nana. That means a lot more than you know. The family is doing well too.

*something about me writing in my diary blah blah*

Yeah, byeee~

Bye, little Nana. Thanks for leaving this message for me.

In Musings
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